My wonderful family: (From top left) Jessie, Uncle Ramesh, my cousin Rabina, Aunty Kamana, baby Ragina, me, cousin from another household, cousin Rabin, Buwa Rajesh (dad), Hasuraama (grandma) and Aama Shymu (mum). Suraz (my brother) took the photo and Sabina (my sister) was away.
Hasuraama, on the morning we set off back to England.
Second parents. I miss them so much!
Me and my roomie, Jessie, at Sirutar school.
A good way to start the day.
A typical breakfast!
A little girl I met in the village, Sabina. She came to play with us and gave me a flower in return.
Dikshya Rai Uka, the little girl from the orphanage that drew a picture for me of a house with running water and flowers. I would have adopted her in a second if I could!
My cousin Ragina. She lived with us and brightened up every day. She is quite possibly the cutest baby on this earth. ..and her shoes squeeked when she walked..
One of the many labourors I was blessed to work with. He was up there for hours, hammerring the wobbly framework together.
I took this photo on the way back from Lamatar - where the other group of volunteers were living and working. We ended up missing the last bus home so walked our way back to Sirutar as the sun was setting.
When the Lamatar lot came to visit Sirutar. Haven't quite got everyone in I don't think. Bal Krishna was their supervisor (bottom right) and he is a funny funny man. "What is the craaack?!"
Mint and Cherry shisha in Kathmandu.
This is Cha Cha (which means uncle) He told me that he saw me as his daughter on this day. He's a very nice man
Me and Aama. If there is anything that I miss about Nepal, over all else, it is this woman. She is beautiful, kind and funny. I miss her loads and loads
I love this photo
Nagarkot We watched the sunrise over the Himalaya. The beauty was so vast and overwhelming!
This is my brother Suraz with the guitar I brought over. He was learning to play so the guitar stayed when it came time for me to leave.
Aaron, Rowan and I showing off the view from outside our houses. This is what happened on a clear day! Beauty beauty beauty ..the mountains, not us..
Currently talking to Matt on the Wonder that is Facebook and I've come to realize that I just can't cope.
I can't cope with the thought of leaving this place, not seeing the locals everyday and feeling a part of something. I can't cope with leaving my family behind, not loving and laughing with them day in day out. I can't cope with the thought of my life back home, the lack of a job and idea of what I want to do. I can't cope with the feeling of missing Matt so much. ...or even the thought of seeing him in the train station in three days time. I can't cope with the intensity of this beautiful landscape, with the Himalayas poking out as though it's normal to be so BIG.
Mainly, I just proper can't cope with the sheer amount of happiness I feel right now.
....I'm completely in love with a person and a place.
I probably feel happier than I ever have done before in my life.
I'm coming home in 2 days and I feel really scared.
I have things to look forward too that completely outweigh any bad things; but coming home just feels weird.
On that note I will say good bye.... and good night to those of you in England.
Today was the last day of construction work.. what a relief! I've actually really enjoyed the work, it's been a right challenge at times! Feels good to have achieved so much and I'm now looking forward to spending these last 6 days work-free! Yippee!
The first floor is getting done!!! Chuffed!
The majority of the volunteers have gone to Thamel again to enjoy the city for the last time, but I've chosen to spend it here in my village with my famly. Can't believe I have to leave it all!!!! I've been spending a lot of time on my rooftop recently.. I've taken to bringing my guitar up there and writing or singing songs and looking at the beautiful mountains that surround us. I love it!!!!
I often go up in the mornings and chill out before the day begins - I generally go up at around 7.30 and feel the heat set in! The photos just don't do it justice!
It's been a strange week. Simply in the fact that I've witnessed SO much animal sacrifice. This was one of the things that was putting me off coming to Nepal with Platform2 but when I read in to it, I didn't get the impression that it happened quite so often! To be fair though, there has only been one animal sacrifice - at the Nepali New Year - up until now... and all I saw of that was the goat. Alive.
In my last blog I mentioned the sacrifice I witnessed on Monday.. Well, since then there has been one a day, then four yesterday and today hundreds were brought to their fate. I experienced them parading the bodies of the animals around with their head on a platter along with other offerings (both goats and ducks) as well as seeing them splash the blood from their severed necks up the walls of the temples.
If I was to read this I wouldn't have thought that I could handle it.But being here, I just have to. I can't bring myself to condone it, or even accept it... but I can keep my opinions to myself and get on with it. On the second day I got emotional about it because it was the second time I'd seen it and was then told that it would be happening up until we leave. I cried in to my wheelbarrow for a while then got on with the day quietly, with the odd conversation of 'just why???'. It was proper hard cos it just doesn't seem right to me. I know that the meat is eaten and everything from the animal is used... but I just don't like the reason behind it. I don't like the fact that it is done for religion and done to please a god. A god who desires blood. I was speaking to Khyam about it and he said that in the Terai region, where he's from, there's a festival every year where his family would sacrifice at least 4 goats. He then went on to say that he doesn't condone this and they now spill the blood of coconuts instead. As more of a symbol. I hope this is a sign of change over here. .........I hope this isn't me being ignorant!
Anyway, that's all for now as I'm gonna head towards the noodle bar. Hopefully haven't been bitten to smitherines by the bloody mozzies in here - AGAIN!
I've come to realize that I haven't actually said anything about the work we're doing... or even mentioned anything about it! Strange really with it occupying my time 5/6 days a week!
This was the work site when we first arrived... it was hard to see what we were aiming for to begin with as we weren't shown or really told any plans/what it's gonna look like! It was also hard to tell how much we would be doing as EVERYTHING is done the Nepali way.... Frustrating at times as things tend to go slowly and tasks end up being repeated/pointlessly made difficult!!! It's proper hot as well which doesn't help - 30 degrees on average!!!!
The manual labour we've been doing is fair intense... at first it was haaaard to handle but now I feel the fittest I've been in years! I love it! We tend to shift gravel and sand from one side of the village to the other in the dodgiest wheelbarrows imaginable and move piles from one side of the work site to the other a lot... we also mix cement in the shape of a BIG volcano which is really fun but tough on the arms! We shifted all the wood from the other end of the village, made huge platforms at the front of the school, filled all the squares, got the walls up and running and twisted/bent/cut the iron rods.... done loads and I've probably forgotten some of the monotonous jobs we did... but I'd like to leave it that way!!
Yesterday was a weird day at work...
I had a right nice morning pottering around, then ate a looooooovely breakfast - rice pudding and fried potatoes, mmmmmmmmm!!!! Well good, but very hot and we were a bit late cos of it!! Tut! Got to work and me and Rowan shared a wheelbarrow for sand/gravel and as we walked past the first temple there was blood EVERYWHERE and then loads of men walked out with a decapitated goat with it's neck dripping blood, a kettle full of the stuff and it's head on a platter with other offerings. Straight after, a dog tried to go in to the temple and was whacked HARD on the legs with a massive stick....
Something that gets me over here is the treatment of animals. With it being a Hindu/Buddhist country I thought that there would be more compassion shown toward them.... I knew animal sacrifice went on but seeing it was harsh. So glad I didn't see the actual act or hear the goat.... makes me sad. Also in the village there's a puppy with it's jaw kicked in, a puppy that can barely walk and looks SO thin and weak, a dog that limps really bad that we saw someone then ride in to on their bike laughing, and a dog being thrown by his neck down an 8ft drop on the the work site... WHY? It's just a common sound to hear yelping! Saying this though, I can't condemn a nation to the acts of a few... but I don't like the way it is so readily accepted. I feel like I've even hardened to a lot of it though.... which is a strange feeling, but then if I hadn't everything would be affecting me too much! I'm really glad that I was put with a family who aren't like this. We have a dog called chentu and he's looked after so well! Also, when there's a bug around it is NEVER killed and if someone tried to they're stopped. Apparently the bugs are our friends... personally wouldn't go that far, but I totally disagree with killing them! I do love my family you know!!!!!
Me and Chentu! :D
Something else that's harsh around the village is the treatment of a certain boy who caught malaria as a baby/small child. Some of the volunteers call him the 'dribble kid' which I find a bit horrible really. The locals push him around and generally mock him, and the other children tend to bully him... It just points out the lack of understanding and the lack of facilities here to handle these kinds of things. Again, saying this, I do think it's just a lack of understanding, or maybe just a way of coping with the situation. I don't know. I've only been here 2 months so can't really make big claims!
Also saw a man publicly smack a women over and over again at our work site.. THAT was horrible, and I cried quite a lot!
So yea... seen some mad things here, but I don't see these as bad experiences... they were hard but they made me realise what was out there a bit more and 'hardened' me up to cope with stuff. Makes it easier to do something about a situation if you're not on the floor crying about it!!
Anyway, didn't mean for this blog to get so negative but I'm glad I got stuff on here that has stuck with me.
Something I feel that I've gained from this experience is tolerance. I haven't been in this kind of situation ever before in my life! The culture, the traditions, the religion, the [behavior of] people and most of all, the group dynamics!! The best complement I've had in a very long time was when Jessie told me that she admired my tolerance when I was having a really hard week with the group. Sometimes it's hard to accept the way people act and the things that people think/say, but here you just have t get on with it. You can't walkaway from situations and expect never to come across it again... things either need to be resolved here or an agreement needs to be made to leave it as a misunderstanding. I have noticed a lack of maturity in the group and also total lack of understanding at times. It feels a bit like I've gone back to high school. After going to Thamel, I feel like I get on with everyone in the group again.. I've had my ups and downs with people, like everyone else, but now I've let things drop that I thought would hold out til the end of the trip... Proper happy about it. Only a week and a bit to go til the end so I'm planning on keeping out of any form of lingering horridness!!
Written a few songs whilst I've been out here, so looking forward to a gig when I get home (wink wink nudge nudge Chris!!) Also looking forward to Matt's gig - Purple Buddha - at the Derbys, so hope everyone comes!! I miss everyone a right lot!
Anyway, been on here for an hour now so gonna get myself off and ready for another day of work!
It's Monday the 17th of May and I now have 10 days until I return back to the UK, tan line en all! With the weekend just gone being the second to last weekend here in Nepal, I decided to spend it in Kathmandu! Me and a couple of others jumped on the bus and waved goodbye to Sirutar for a couple of days (we haven't been able to leave due to Maoist strikes/mass protests/etc) looking for a bit of an escape from workworkwork and some harsh group dynamics!! I was pulled between a women and her three children, who all ended up asleep.... on me! Then was joined by a few guys asking about Uk - "The country of our dreams!" - and even a "pure Nepali boy" who insisted on getting my number, much to his disappointment!
When we arrived we get to the Hotel and went straight back out to barter our way to beautiful trinkets! I even tret (treated, whatever) myself to a few items!! I'd forgotten how amazing Thamel is (Nepali word for Kathmandu) so was buzzing around the shops/stalls, talking to locals/shop-keepers and laughing at all the hippy-type westerners who avoid eye-contact at ALL costs haha! I'd also forgotten about the street children and deformed beggars... not quite as nice a thing to take in third time round; but then, what can be done???
Despite having the attitude of "I'm not here to party".... I ended up going on a bit of a night time adventure with the group! I ate at Mo Mo's (a cafe where all the staff are deaf and reaaaaaally nice!) with Rowan, Jessie and Jade (and Adam and Anthony on another table) and the rest of the group went to a restaurant called "Dream gardens" - Apparently it was nice there but they payed Rs.1000 and I payed Rs.250. As long as I'm full, I'm happy!!!!!
Bought a cheap bottle of Red with Rowan then ended up at The Reggae Reggae Bar! Decided on a mint shisha between a few of us and had a good laugh!
The ceiling was amazing!
It was such a good atmosphere and we were having a gooood time but it seemed to close a lot earlier than expected (the others had been before)... We made our way downstairs to the club and had a bit of a dance, met some people from around the world but again it closed earlier than expected and we ended up being ushered out by the police (everyone in the club, not just us!!!) I think it was something to do with the political unrest over here as Khyam (our supervisor) told us that things were going down once we were back! Out side the club I was snogged on the cheek by a driver of a rickshaw in an attempt to avoid! He then went on to say that he liked Jewish girls....hmmmmmm! It was a strange night, but I couldn't have made it any better. It was nice to spend time with the group away from work too!
Still in need of some Northern humour, but then I'm home in ten days.... so I'm sure I can hold out til then!
See you all soon! Going for my dahl bhat breakfast now, so glad that Aama is such an amazing cook - I've got it lucky!!
Love to you all,
Zara :)
p.s. I'll whack some pics up when the computer decides to respond!!!
Me and my little cousin when Aama dressed me up in a Sari.... I felt unbelievably girly! This was the day of our mid-term seminar and I was doing a presentation on the culture out here. It's mad that we're living right in the middle of everything.
I really haven't been on the ball when it comes to blogging! I've been here nearly eight weeks and this is only my second one.... Sorry!!!
Right so, I only have about 15 minutes before I need to run off again to have breakfast and got to work...
The main thing I need to say is that I have completely fallen in love with both my family out here in Nepal and my boyfriend back home in the UK. It's mad. I feel SO much love!! Haha My family are the most wonderful, understanding and funny people I've ever met and they've completely taken me in as their daughter! Aama (mum) is so sweet and even though she doesn't speak much English we have a right laugh together.. She's really comforting when I'm not feeling at my best and always seems to know when I need a bit of contact! I love her! (Mum, don't get jealous!!) As for Buwa (Dad), he's a bit of a joker in the best way possible. Even when he seems stern he often bursts out laughing!! He brightens up situations and looks after the family so well! He's the only one who can milk our cow too and even if he gets home reeeaaallly late from work we'll here him out there doing his duty :) Suraz, my brother, was kicked by the cow not long back so had to fashion a black eye for a while haha! Not good! Suraz is lovely too.. he's 18 and is really easy to have a good conversation with and also - like the rest of the family - he has a very good sense of humour! I started teaching him guitar but he has exams so it's hard to make time! Something that makes me laugh is when they mimic my accent! I thought it was only gonna be the other volunteers who would do this... but even my Nepali family do it hahaha. They always say "proper well good", "well impressed", "a tiiiiineh little bit", "hiiiiii" and Suraz even says "Eeeeh by gum lass!!" .....I am proper well impressed!! :D My sister Sabina is amazing too.. I feel like I can proper talk to here!! She's so lovely and we have really nice chats when we're both free! She's in college (uni) studying microbiology (If I'm wrong please correct me Sabina!!) and she also holds a lot of responsibility around the house, in the fields, etc! I love her!! She's my brown eyed girl :) That's something too... whenever I play my guitar in my room I ALWAYS get a tap on my window and a request for me to play to them instead of just to myself!! It's stopping me from writing my songs, but I love it cos it proper gets the family together and they all sit around and have a laugh. Rejina, my little 1 1/2 year old cousin dances around and laughs the whole time. SO cute!!! She always wanders in to my room as well and plays pee-ca-boo with my mozzy net haha She's part of the extended family that live on the ground floor :) They're all lovely! We have three cousins and an uncle and aunty. So nice!
Something I nearly forgot to mention is my room mate, Jessie! At first I found that I didn't get enough space out here cos we're all constantly working with each other and going away with one another... and my bedroom is normally my space to just chill and think about stuff. Hard when you're sharing it. However, I do find that it has been to my advantage that I was placed with Jessie.. She's chilled out and nice and is really easy to talk to. We've had loads of conversations that've sorted my head out when things've been too overwhelming (i.e. culture shocks/group dynamics) and I'm proper glad that we were put together :) niceness
In just over two weeks I'm going to be leaving this place and returning back home to my family, friends, lifestyle... and Matt. I just don't want to leave my family behind and what I have here. The village is my home and the villagers are all part of the family.. the sense of community is amazing here. The other day we were playing with a kid (who gave me a flower and said "you must show me games" in a very innocent way!) and we had such a laugh. Then a load of the Ideal Friendship-Nepal team came along to chill/get some things done and cha cha (one of the skilled laborers) said that he saw me as his daughter. I love the love here. There's so much of it!!!! The main reason - and probably the only reason at this point - that I want to come home is for Matt. I can't believe I haven't seen him in nearly 2 months!!! It's proper flown by but there are moments where I just proper miss him. loads! It's kind of made things even better though cos we're well close and our phone calls are well funny! He rung last night (a few times due to the dodgy connection) and I was literally wriggling around my bed with laughter. This was after being segregated at dinner due to my menstruation cycle, which I find SO hard, so just made everything amazing again. I really do love him, it's nice.
Think I'm gonna have to go and have breakfast in a minute so I'm gonna leave it at that! Now that I've started I'm hoping to get on it like sonic with these blogs and get up to date!!
The family!!!!
Flying alongside the Himalayas
Second parents. I miss them so much!
Me and my roomie, Jessie, at Sirutar school.
A good way to start the day.
A typical breakfast!
A little girl I met in the village, Sabina.
I took this photo on the way back from Lamatar - where the other group of volunteers were living and working.
When the Lamatar lot came to visit Sirutar.
Mint and Cherry shisha in Kathmandu.
This is Cha Cha
Nagarkot
This is my brother Suraz with the guitar I brought over.
Aaron, Rowan and I showing off the view from outside our houses.
